As seen on www.woot.com

[RealBlackStuff]

Woot's been at it again:

I'm Getting Too Old For This Sheet

This is what happens when you purchase only sheets for
several years.

Welcome to my sheet hut. It's made of sheets so you know it's
not just a clever name. Come on in, have a seat on a pile of
sheets. Can I get you a glass of sheet. Haha, I'm just kidding, I
don't have any glasses. Here, feel free to just gnaw on this
sheet. It's green so I tell myself it's salad.

Let me show you the garage. It houses my sheet car. Well yes,
you're right, it is just a pile of sheets with some sheets rolled up
to crudely resemble tires. But hey, gotta get from A to B, am I
right? Hahaha, I'd love to get a ride with you later, I have to go
into town and buy more sheets.

And this is the bathroom. Let's not spend any time in here please.

This is my favorite room, the den. As you can see, I've
cataloged all my favorite sheets over the years and organized
them carefully on this bookshelf, or sheetshelf. I haven't read a
book in ages.

Well I hope you enjoyed this little sheet show. And remember,
if you ever need a sheet, don't you lay a hand on my property or
I'll sic my lawyer on you. [points to a pile of sheets in the corner]